Senate Bill 155 – the heralded “Brunch Bill” – will make Carolina Panthers fans weak this coming football season, as the legislation placates supporters into a coma of frittatas and Bloody Mary’s.
The bill makes it legal for establishments to serve alcohol starting at 10 a.m. on Sundays, when previously they weren’t allowed to sell such beverages until noon.
Do not fall under the impression that I am a teetotaler. My girthy stomach suggests otherwise. However, there are cultural implications to account for. Dire, unforeseen consequences will materialize if we, as a state, indirectly advocate for the brunch industry.
Panthers games, notably, will take a dive.
Before the bill, if you wanted to enjoy a Panthers tailgate, the opportunistic fan had to buy alcohol ahead of time, usually the Saturday before, like normal human beings living in an organized society.
Was it upsetting? Absolutely, but so is watching Cam Newton throw on his back foot; but he still does, and we still watch him.
Kudos to a cherished era, and what an era it was. Bygone are the days of Panthers tailgates with “Bud heavy” and Bojangles Fried Chicken, tossing the pigskin and listening to county music on an overpriced parking lot.
I will gladly wait two hours – or stock my cooler ahead of time – if it means forgoing the castration of a fan base that already has accusations of bandwagoning. I’m afraid this will be the tipping point.
Think about it. Panthers fans will be so busy getting tipsy and dining on tartines at a brunchery to go burp and slurp on the black top with the boys. They will turn into wine-and-cheese fans who clap with their fingers or worse – sit on their hands entirely. They’ll grow soft and gelatinous. Low energy, no stamina. Sad!
The brunchification of Charlotte will see the collapse of a Sunday staple. If this is Donald Trump’s America, then I can understand why everyone is freaking out.
John Patrick attends UNC Charlotte. He is interning with Charlotte Media Group this summer.
On the bandwagon
Charlotte and Mecklenburg County are among municipalities passing local ordinances allowing the sale of alcohol before noon on Sundays. Mint Hill commissioners will consider such an ordinance Aug. 10.